There are 4 Stress Response Patterns: Fight, Flight, Freeze, Fawn

Your Relationship Roadblock Pattern Type is:

Pleaser Patty (Fawn Response)

Patty is the ultimate harmonizer, bending over backward to make her marriage work. She’s the one who smooths the edges, often at the cost of her own needs.

Eager to please and quick to appease, Patty is all about finding solutions. Her focus? A picture-perfect marriage. Yet, in her quest for peace, Patty might overlook the deeper emotional currents, risking her own identity in the process.

Patty’s challenge is to focus on achieving  balance, gaining confidence and empowerment while maintaining the  harmony that she values.

 

The Fawn Response has both Strengths and Weaknesses

Strengths:

Accommodating: Prioritizes harmony and works hard to maintain it.

Empathetic: Highly attuned to others’ needs and emotions.

Solution-Oriented: Focused on resolving issues and finding common ground.

 

Weaknesses:

Self-Neglect: Risks losing personal identity by overly accommodating others.

Emotional Suppression: Might ignore one’s own feelings to keep the peace.

Conflict Avoidance: May overlook underlying issues in an effort to avoid tension.

 

ACTION PLAN

 

You might try to appease or please others during conflicts or when you’re feeling stressed. This is known as the ‘fawn’ response, and while it’s a natural way to try to keep the peace, it’s also important to maintain your own boundaries and needs. Here are some tips that might help:

Recognize Your Fawn Response: Awareness is the first step. Notice when you’re giving in or people-pleasing, especially if it goes against your own needs or feelings.

Practice Assertiveness: Work on expressing your own needs and opinions respectfully. Assertiveness is about being honest about your feelings and needs without being aggressive. Using a tool like our Difficult Conversation template would help you to know exactly what to say so you don’t offend or worse cause a fight. 

Set Boundaries: Learn to set healthy boundaries. It’s okay to say no or to express when something doesn’t feel right for you. Boundaries protect the relationship and are not designed to punish. If this is a tough one for you then you would benefit from our Beautiful Boundaries Workshop and templates.

Understand Your Worth: Remember that your opinions and feelings are just as valid as anyone else’s. You don’t always have to bend to others to be valued or loved. Own your power (which is the first pillar inside our member portal btw).

Identify Your Needs: Take time to understand what you really need and want in various situations, apart from the desire to keep others happy. 

Self-Care Practices: Engage in activities that strengthen your sense of self and well-being. This can help boost your confidence in standing up for yourself. Tools like our Holistic Love Me Journal would be helpful.

 

BREAKING YOUR PATTERN

Realize that conflict can be healthy and necessary. When you withhold your thoughts and feelings in an attempt to please and avoid conflict you are not helping build your connection.

During the conflict, listen, express your love and give your thoughts and feelings in a nonconfrontal manner.

You are taking action, instead of falling back into your pattern. This is the first step in breaking the pattern.

For more on how to break this pattern and better communication with your partner I invite you to check out Relationship Restoration Accelerator.

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